STOP BINDI IRWIN NOW
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The vegetable kind! You can never really accuse someone of being obsessive over their garden in a negative way if it produces something they can eat. That is my theory. Plus any garden that yields fruit, herbs, vegetables etc. is technically impressive in its own right. If you want to get really fancy you can try things like companion planting to improve the longevity of plants and as a natural form of pest control. Probably don’t buy things like “bulbs” and steer clear of petunias.
This sounds like a problem that is going to require some conscious effort. Clearly you’ve got some level of awareness of what’s going on, which is GREAT, it means you’ve noticed this pattern and it will be much easier to try and curb the habit. It sounds like the first thing you need to do is love yourself. Physically. Metaphysically. Emotionally. Secondly you need to realise that everyone you meet will have flaws and part of caring about someone is accepting this. These are quite difficult things to do and will not happen overnight. (except Julia, she has no flaws. She is perfect and beautiful like an angel.) [Yep, relationships between two perfect people are pretty easy]